Friday, August 1, 2014

I just can't help myself sometimes....

I try to be a good person.

I try not to gossip.

I try to set a good example for my children.

But then some incident will toss all that goodness out the window and I have to start over at ground zero. Yes, I am back at ground zero after the story I am about to tell you.

First let me say I work for a VERY and I mean V - E - R - Y conservative company.  We have approximately 10,000 signs alone in our office building. Everything from be sure to scan your security card before entering the elevator to restrooms ----> to caution stairs to how to change the coffee filters. You name it - conservatism is a way of life.

Besides the signs, we have extremely aggressive safety rules. I understand 100% wanting to get home safely every night and it is vitally important for those people working in the field but we take things to the extreme.

Yes I am getting to my story but you needed some background to understand my story.

After my lunch-time workout I get a cup of ice to take back to my desk for my afternoon water. I like the ice in our break room area as it is the tiny small pieces a bit larger than crushed ice for my cup. I don't like the giant cubes so I make special effort to get ice before returning to my desk.  So as I am waiting for the elevator with my coworker I reach into my glass to pluck out a tiny piece to eat.  Oopsie, it falls on the ground. Well I know this is a company sin so I kick the minuscule piece of ice over right next to the wall out of every one's way and no one will be injured from this piece of ice.

I get on the elevator with a bunch of people.  There is a lady still outside the elevator that must have seen me move the ice and it was just not good enough for her. She makes loud disgruntled grunting noises as she is bending down to pick up this 3/4 melted piece of ice to show how displeased she is for me doing such an atrocity. How could anyone  leave that ice cube beside the wall to melt? 

The elevator doors are now beginning to close and I just can't help myself. I take a much larger chunk of ice and toss it out the almost closed elevator doors.  My friend bursts out laughing so hard I think she is going to pass out. Two of the other passengers have looks of terror on their face that I would do such a thing and one passenger pretends not to see anything.

I am sure a safety bulletin will be distributed shortly on the dangers of ice in the workplace. If only I could have hit her with it...

No comments:

Post a Comment